Week 10 MKMMA

“Upon what does causation depend?  Upon polarity, a circuit must be formed; the Universal is the positive side of the battery of life, the individual is the negative, and thought forms the circuit.”

Can it be said then that since an individual is the negative side of the battery, one must be positive in thought to plug into Universal Mind to complete the circuit and be in the flow?  Just thinking.

Week 9 MKMMA Chisel to Find My Sizzle

It’s time for me to catch up with my blog.  I’ve caught up on most of the other work.  Ill refer to them as fun exercises instead though because they are just that –  it certainly isn’t work doing this course.  It’s a lot of fun.  I just wish I didn’t have all the other real work to do that keeps me from doing MKMMA.  Because really, THIS is where my heart and soul is.  THIS is what I want to do all day.  Sit.  Explore.  Discover.  Breathe.  MKMMA is like oxygen for my mind, heart and soul.

What is work is getting my DMP right.  There is something that is still off for me.  Something that is buried. Under cement perhaps?

 

Week 8 MKMMA – The Killing Fields

Last week was a really tough week for me.  The battleground was bloody. I didn’t get to my blog because of all the pummeling back and forth.

It was a struggle between my old blueprint and my new emerging blueprint – the new me.  The more I tried to stop the old blueprint from taking over,  the stronger it seemed to become.  At least that’s what I thought. The old peptides were trying to strangle the new seeds that had been planted and were starting to take root.  I was fully aware of this battle scene taking place. And I was helpless to do anything but watch.

Day in and day out the battle took place.  I would barely pick up Og and start reading, ‘I will greet this day with love in my heart’ when I would hear this taunting voice, “Oh, I will greet this day with blech!  Yuck!  Whatever!”  That’s as far as I got a few days.  It was ugly.  (The binding on the book is still in tact, I am happy to report.)

Each time my new habits attempted to take hold, my old crusty blue print punched her in the face, or stomach, or tripped her.  And then one morning, without warning, my new blueprint, I, outsmarted the old cemented blueprint and turned on the iPad and let Og do the reading for me.  Take that old blueprint! Karate Chop!  ‘Die, Old Blueprint, Die!’

Next, I found my index cards.  “What the hell is a trinket?”  “A smile.”  <grimace>  “I don’t feel like smiling.”  So, I just let my old blueprint be.  And stew.

I gave the Mental Diet an honest :30.  Back to the beginning I went.

My old blueprint was pouting.  “I don’t feel like writing a blog about this inner battle.  I’ve never had to battle a new blueprint.  No one has ever challenged my foothold here!”

Somewhere over the weekend my new blueprint, with its stealth wisdom, wrestled and possibly suffocated my old blueprint with a pillow when she wasn’t aware.

My new blueprint is germinating nicely.  It’s not going anywhere.  This week I’m giving it a little more attention and love and sunshine and water.  And a good douse of Miracle Grow.

Week 7 MKMMA – Angst & Audicity

I’ve said it before in my previous blogs:  All I want is to focus on MKMMA all day!  I really see the changes that have occurred in these last few weeks.  Even more importantly, I have felt the changes. So believe me when I say it is killing me that I haven’t been able to keep with the routine I have been establishing to change my blueprint!!!!!

Like a schoolgirl, I carry my workbook and Og (with my functional bookmarks) with me everywhere I go hoping to steal, even a moment, where I can escape and envelop myself in my MKMMA cocoon.  Aaaaaah!  Cocoon take me away!!!
But that has happened for me this week.
AND I REALLY NEED MY FIX.

I felt even more angst today as we were selecting music for our first big training event being held this Saturday.  This has been the most fun of well, launching our pre-launch.  “It’s Getting Started,” “You Can Do Magic,” “Today’s Gonna Be A Good Day,”  “Happy,” “Flawless,” “Shake It Off”  “Theme from Rocky” etc.  . . .  you get the picture.  So while I did get to hear some tunes that I may be able to work in with my DMP, that’s about as far as I’ve gotten.

But at least I’ve completed my blog.  And no matter what setbacks I have encountered or how challenging it has been to get to much of my MKMMA this week, I remain committed to DO IT NOW.  I can be who I will to be. Believe.

Week 7 MKMMA I Think Therefore I Am

The ‘Temple of the Living God” and the individual “I” is given control and upon his understanding of the mechanism which is within his control will the result depend. Another reference to the great ‘I Am’?  God is love and he is within each of us.  “All life and all power is from within.” God has granted us the power to control the world within so that we may have great influence and control on the world without.

“And as the most powerful forces of Nature are the invisible forces, so we find that the most powerful forces of man are his invisible forces, his spiritual force, and the only way in which the spiritual force can manifest is through the process of thinking.  Thinking is the only activity which the spirit possesses, and thought is the only product of thinking.

Addition and subtraction are therefore spiritual transactions; reasoning is a spiritual process; ideas are spiritual conceptions; questions are spiritual searchlights and logic, argument and philosophy is spiritual machinery.

Every thought brings into action certain physical tissue, parts of the brain, nerve or muscle.  This produces an actual physical change in the construction of the tissue.  Therefore, it is only necessary to have a certain number of thoughts on a given subject in order to bring about a complete change in the physical organization of a man.

This is the process by which failure is changed to success.

“Thought is mind in motion just as wind is air in motion.  Since thoughts are causes, conditions must be effects; if we can control the cause we can also control the effect.”  Certainly, all men are innately aware of this on some level?  Or is this too much for us to be accountable and responsible for in our own great yet short lives?  Perhaps it is that we truly are just as marvelous as we suspect but are afraid of the true power we know we possess within?  “God’s gift to us is life; what we do with it is our gift to him.”

Week 5 – The Big ‘O’

I’ve tried to sensor myself this week.  Really, I have.  But I know I could do better.
In my opinion.

But I cannot help myself and now I am going to OPINE all over myself – and my page.
I am loving every aspect of this journey.  I only wish I had more time to do it.  I wish I had more time to devote to its implementation because I know it is working.  I can see it and I can feel it.  It’s like a drug and I am hooked.

And everyone is doing it.
Taking the course with my husband and friends and fellow affiliates is making this encounter all the richer – and deeper.  Although we are all so busy NO ONE has time to compare notes. . . or of course share an opinion.

This experience has been magical.  And seductive.  I cannot wait to basque in the afterglow and to have the ‘Bird’s Eye View’ on this course when it is all done.  We are all learning so much about ourselves – our brains, our thoughts, our power all while exploring new toys and tools with different aspects of social media – blogs, tweets, webinars, etc.  It’s all so fun and exciting right now – I can’t wait for more!  But the beautiful thing is that this education, this relationship with ourselves and others and discovery will continue even after the final course date has come to an end.

I have an idea we don’t even know what we don’t know.  I’m enjoying the journey and am trusting the process!

And I just want more.

All Roads Lead to Blown

Last week’s lesson impacted me so much I started crying during the middle of the Master Keys webcast while several people were sitting, watching the webinar with us.  Many thoughts came to my mind and I was just overwhelmed with joy and emotion and a huge “Thank you, God!”

And my mind is still blown.  I have listened to parts of the webcast over again.  I have read each week’s Master Key notes over again.  I am in love with this program.  It is in sync with all my spiritual and religious beliefs and is what I innately have always suspected.  Hallelujah!  What a relief and what joy!  It’s not just that we have control over the way we think, but the realization that this IS the POWER and the GIFT we all have!  Once we understand it and put it to use – just the control that is available to change our thoughts and subsequently our lives!  KABOOM!

My parents ALWAYS taught me that I could be anything I wanted to be and that I could achieve ANYTHING I put my mind to.  Did THEY understand what they were saying on the level of Master Keys?

And then, of course, my mind goes to our son, Gavin.  How could this help him?  How could this be communicated in a way to him that could maybe free him from Autism?

And my mind goes to our other son, Reagan.  This would be GREAT to teach to our 5 year old!  Teach it in the way it is really meant and in the manner that a young child could comprehend.  I think he would get it in a heartbeat.  Or in a Solar Plexus beat.

Regardless, I am excited to get back to reading more of the Master Keys, applying it each day thus creating a HABIT that will change my life from this day forward.   My mind and blueprint are BLOWN.  I am changed.

Week 3 – Tony Robbins in the House!

I’ve just returned home from watching Tony Robbins at Go Pro Marketing!  Such great energy!  Although I had to leave early to come home to my children, I thought I would share some of the nuggets from tonight’s event.

One of the messages I keep hearing over and over and over again (so it must be true, right? Or I must really need to hear it!) is about our greatest ability as humans:
Controlling our thoughts is EVERYTHING!!
We need to strive for the mastery of our own mental and emotional state.

Eighty percent of success is psychology; 20% is mechanics.
Charisma is energy.
And I really LOVED this:  PERFECT is the lowest standard in the world because we suffer so much striving for something that is unattainable.
The secret to living is giving.
If you’re going through Hell, keep going!
Life isn’t happening to you – it’s happening FOR you!
Plant and give when you have nothing to give.
If I’m sad, angry, etc.  it is me.  TAKE CONTROL!
Mastering your ability to change your own state as well as others’ – move to change your state. Failure due to lack of resourcefulness.
People suffer floods, tornadoes, etc. sometimes in the same location every three years!!!  Why?  Wouldn’t you move?  “But it’s home.”
Pain is something to use.
Which positive words/feelings can I use to overcome and completely wipe out the negative words/feelings I use?
The language we use affects us and others – bum vs. ass vs. butt or cock vs. penis, etc.
Courage unused shrinks.
I am courage!  I am faith!

Passion you don’t express becomes weak.
Guilt and depression are selfish – no longer have radiance for others, life.
Whatever you focus on you’re going to feel.
Controlling our focus is the single most important thing in life.
Move states – divorce bad emotions.
So in essence, HUMAN EMOTION is the greatest form of capital in the world.

Amen!

Week 2 – Leaves of Change

Still working on my DMP and making some great changes to more clearly define my purpose. Having those visual words certainly makes it all more real in my mind’s eye.  I am able to see it all happening!

What I’ve noticed this week is that I am much more aware of where I allow my brain to go.  I feel more in control of what I am thinking and am able to shift gears easily if I hear negativity coming my way. I really feel the need and would love to just meditate and read all the time!  I am anxious to dig in and savor the journey we are all on.

And for what I believe is the first time, I have felt anger.  I am certain it has to do with my first post that I wrote last week.  It hit me like an anvil falling out of the sky  I was watching our two boys wait for the bus.  Reagan, 5, was drawing and writing a book while Gavin, 9, was staring and completely blank.  I saw and felt the distinct difference between them so profoundly that as soon as they were on the bus I began to cry.  But these were not tears of pity.  These were tears of rage at what happened to our beautiful son. What happened to him never should have happened.  It wasn’t his fault and IT WASN’T MY FAULT.  Nine years of guilt and tears.  I’ve always felt that all my energies should be placed toward his recovery and THEN and ONLY THEN would I go after the hospital.  Now I feel that I may be able to start very soon on justice for our son, too.  So I suppose I needed to get that out the first week so that I can function, rewire and receive.

I am excited for this next week of discovery and growth!

Week 1 – Forgiveness. Will I Ever Know It?

Time to write my blah, blah, blah, blah blog.

In desperation to recover and rediscover my sense of self there is undoubtedly a bit I need to get through. So here goes, I bear my heart and wounds to the world.  World wide web that is.

I had always been a driver,Type= A personality that set a goal and always achieved it.  Then I became a mom.

Having a son born at 26 weeks, a micro-preemie weighing 918 grams, the doctors told us we would not take him home until his due date 3 months later.  I disagreed. Obviously, these doctors had no idea that I had always been an over-achiever that achieved and attained anything and everything I put out into the universe and set my sights on. His dad is kind of the same way.  Naturally, our son had inherited these same genes of drive and determination and would receive the ‘memo’ that he would be going home from the hospital within about 5 weeks.  Way ahead of schedule.

One hundred sixteen days later, we finally got to bring Gavin home.  And he came home with monitors and nurses and all sorts of special instructions.  I was drenched in sweat 24 hours a day.  I was so in love with this baby boy and so terrified I was not prepared to take adequate care of him.

I did everything wrong.  Because Gavin arrived so early, I hadn’t ‘researched’ vaccines. While still in hospital, the doctor asked if I wanted to vaccinate.  I was taken aback – of course we would consider it but he wasn’t even supposed to have arrived at this time.  The doctor, whom I inherently trusted, insisted it was safe and that we would be protecting him.  Reluctantly, I agreed to the Hep B vaccination.  After all, they had saved both our lives.

Instead, they gave Gavin, our now 4 pound micro-preemie, 5 shots within a 24-hour period.  He went downhill fast and returned to the NICU.  This is where the damage was done.  He was put on Phenobarbital.  He was having seizures. The doctors told us none of this.

In fact, the doctors failed to send baby home with any of his medications or prescriptions.  So on top of being a first-time mother and having this little, itty-bitty baby, the doctors failed us both miserably.  At the time I had no idea what had happened to either one of us and the discovery of just exactly what did happen still unfolds even as I type.

I cried and cried and cried every day for the first five years of his life.  This beautiful boy had been entrusted to me and I didn’t know what to do for him.  And I didn’t know what to do for myself anymore either.  This ‘Driver, Type-A’ was a total wreck that had driven off the rails in search of a cliff or a brick wall.